My teenage boy is annoyed on the verge of declaring Unilateral Declaration of My Room is Independent of the Rest of the House and especially My Sister , or "UDMRIRHEMS" if you will.
Apparently terrible things have been done to his room, apparently she ~his malicious mean moody sister ~took her DVD player back, which he ~ the brother ~ had borrowed.
I also need to add although he had borrowed "with asking", she had borrowed back "without asking". She did it without asking by damn. Of teenage sins this is a biggee. If there was a need for a eleventh commamdment by double damn and Almighty this is it ~ Thou shalt not borrow without asking.
Not only but also...
Maliciously during this time, in which she was in his room, she made a mess ~ yes, a "Mess"~ perhaps if I was a proper father in a fully functioning family unit that could have graced a 1950's BBC information film, I would be caring in this fracture of brotherly love.
Instead I am reduced to saying there is no cat in hell, no snowball in hell, Pryce gettin' in heaven chance that the addition of even an emptied rubbish bin could make a more discernable mess than existed in his room before her unauthorised entry into his room and deliberate mess activity.
In simple terms the room started as a mess and one or two additional items ain't changing the mess status.
Instead I am reduced to saying there is no cat in hell, no snowball in hell, Pryce gettin' in heaven chance that the addition of even an emptied rubbish bin could make a more discernable mess than existed in his room before her unauthorised entry into his room and deliberate mess activity.
In simple terms the room started as a mess and one or two additional items ain't changing the mess status.
However my superdad supersenses were going sonic. I detected sibling rivalry was going nuclear, there was a risk of crying, fighting, and general foot stamping in a very un-Goth manner.
So I sprang into action which is itself a biggee exaggeration. Truth be told, I got up and made a cup of tea and then took said cup of tea to the room where squabbling was going on with grown-up swear words thrown in.
I am not one for democracy when there is a sibling squabble to handle. The Western Civilised world's version of democracy ended at the "Welcome" mat of the Pryce family abode. The UN can takes its peace keeping troops to a developing a country with a GDP less than a medium sized US state. This is an autocracy based on my age, fatness, money and general moodiness.
I obeyed my whim that adding a pair of his neatly pressed and wardrobed trousers to the mess on the floor was a good idea. This trouser on floor addition would not be discernable. I threw another pair of trousers on the pile.
I may be a step closer to seeing the Care Home at a prematurely young old age, as soon as that hip replacement "op" is necessary, they will have their revenge.
Now there is still a cup of tea to drink ~ hoorah, which I had to make for myself ~ ho hum.
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